Wasn’t it just a couple weeks ago that I was finally admitting I don’t suck as a dancer? Well, the demons have exacted their revenge for being shelved. My private lessons this week may as well have been group classes with all of the dementors that joined me and Teacher (the demons hired dementors to find their escaped prisoner, get it?).
It’s not easy to admit when you’re wrong, and even harder to admit when you were wrong about completely sucking as a dancer. It’s weird because it’s like you’re humbling and boosting yourself at the same time. “Ok ok, I was wrong. I am a good dancer.”
Amusing side note before I begin: I opened up a blank blog post to begin writing and then just stared at the screen for a few minutes while I thought about how I wanted to start. I started writing things out in my head instead of on the computer screen, but by the time I thought, “oh shoot, I should actually be writing this,” I forgot what I wrote.
That’s what happens when I try writing while I’m still drinking my first cup of tea in the morning.
Embassy Ball is next week!
As follow-up to their joint interview in April, I had asked Elizabeth Thomson and Nicholas Barkley if they would be willing to do individual interviews and share more of how ballroom has impacted their lives. Liz shared her struggles with PTSD and how ballroom brought her back to life in May. Now, we get to hear from Nick!
This month, I invited another dancer to write her own story. We met through Instagram of all places. Her Instagram account (@girlinthe_vans) is mainly videos of her dancing at a gym. No fancy costumes or glamorous settings. Just her, the music, and dance. The story behind these videos is full of pain and loss. But always, there was dance, ready to act as a lifeline when she reached for it.
Just a quick update from me, as I need to get to bed. I compete at Desert Classic on Thursday, but I have to work tomorrow and that means a 5am wake-up call! I still wanted to drop in and say hello.
The big question I assume you have is “am I ready?”
I have about 10 minutes before my lesson starts. I got to the studio really early, so I’ve already done my stretching, drills and a little choreo review. I thought I would take a brief break to check in with you guys. I know it’s been over a week since I last posted, but I have been thinking about you!
I know it’s been longer than usual since I last posted. Searching for a place to live has been stressing me out of my gourd, which has left me with some major writer’s block. Some other things have been adding to the stress level too, and with Teacher out of town last week, I didn’t have any dance lessons to provide relief. So when this inkling of an idea pushed its way to the front of my mind, I jumped on it. The block has been alerted to its presence though, so hopefully it survives long enough for me to create something worth reading. (I have this image of this dark shadow slowly creeping toward the tiny glowing creature that is my inspiration inkling.)
When I first spoke with Nicholas Barkley and Elizabeth Thomson about doing an interview for the blog, I also proposed a second set of individual interviews. Their stories of how ballroom became the key to coping with their PTSD were incredible and deserved their own spaces, separate from their shared story of becoming an amateur couple.
Liz was kind enough to make time for me during one of her visits down to Orange County. We met at my studio after one of my dance lessons and talked for over an hour. While we sat stretched out on the floor of the teachers’ break room, Liz shared her journey, from enlisting in the Army to getting diagnosed with PTSD to finding relief in ballroom. Although she still struggles, ballroom has been Liz’s defibrillator. It brought her back to life and saved her from becoming “just another PTSD statistic.”
Hello my lovely readers!
Just a quick post tonight. I just finished up some work for the main day job. It’s been a busy week (and it’s only Wednesday!) with an extra project for the main job plus side work from the second job. That did not stop me from getting to my dance lesson tonight though.