In my darkest moments, I think about the what ifs that could take ballroom away from me forever. Money, injuries…it’s terrifying!
But I think I can be brave enough against my demons to say, I would still be a dancer!
http://theodysseyonline.com/vcu/if-you-take-dance-away-from-dancer/319658
Coins have been counted, expenses have been tallied, and numbers have been crunched. It looks like the Girl with the Tree Tattoo will not be entering the 2016 Emerald Ball. Or any other competition for the rest of the year, unfortunately.
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After writing the Hermit Weekend post, I recalled a post I had written for the Uphill Factor about two years ago. Eventually, that site will transform or disappear entirely, so I’ve been spending some time revisiting old posts. The particular one I recalled yesterday was written because I had been involved in a debate about debt and pursuing things that make you happy.
The debate was how much money, more specifically how much debt, is acceptable in the pursuit of a passion? At what point do you stop being admirable for following your dreams against any and all odds and start being just foolish and irresponsible?
Two years later, my views haven’t changed much despite my constant questioning of myself and my need to take the occasional hermit weekend.
Every so often I need a hermit weekend. That is, a weekend when I don’t leave the apartment except to walk the dogs. I need the quiet time to recharge and to gather and organize my thoughts. Between my day job, my writing, my dancing, my financial juggling and Life’s latest challenge, I have a lot on my mind! Sometimes it gets to be too much and that’s when I take a hermit weekend.
I originally wrote this letter in 2014 for my old website, the Uphill Factor. I like to reread it every once in awhile to remind myself. I think it’s a nice follow-up to my On Not Giving Up post.
Dear Self-Doubt,
You know that feeling you get when you feel like your budget is in good shape and even after fitting in dance, you still have some wiggle room, but then you have to buy a new car battery and instead of wiggle room, you’re back to wearing a financial corset?
Maybe it’s just me.
Just one more article about CalOpen and then I promise I’ll move on! Per a reader’s request, I’m bringing you back to the days leading up to the competition and revealing some of the things I do as last minute preparations. Ready to hit 88 miles per hour?
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It’s been six days since I danced at the California Open. The days following a competition can be challenging. What goes up must come down, as they say! The big emotions of an event like a ballroom competition (excitement, anxiety, joy, etc.) take a lot of energy, so I can feel drained and even depressed after the external stimuli are gone and the big emotions fade. I call it post-comp blues. I’ve dealt with this emotional rollercoaster after every competition, as well as some lesser events. Sometimes the ride is full of insane ups and downs; other times it is just a little bumpy.
So what about this time? I’ll call it a bumpy road.
Success! I have completed my first competition at the silver level! If you were following me on Facebook, you know how it went.
Today’s the day! First chance to try out my silver skills!
I’m actually feeling pretty good, no major butterflies (yet).
Go to my Facebook page for live updates throughout the day!
Let’s dance!
The Girl with the Tree Tattoo 