I’ve always loved movies about underdogs. Those characters who come from difficult circumstances and have a dream that goes seemingly beyond their means. They don’t quite fit in, but their passion drives them forward anyway. They struggle, suffer defeats, come close to giving up, and ultimately rise to victory. I love a good underdog story because I can relate. I’ve always been a bit awkward, never quite fitting in but also not really wanting to.
I always loved the warning “be careful what you wish for.” We so often think we know what we want, but then, if we actually get it or are set on a path to get it, we realize it isn’t what we expected. Reality rarely matches the fantasy or expectation. It doesn’t mean we should never wish, hope or dream, but we should be careful. We should make sure what we’re wishing, hoping or dreaming is what we truly want.
Excuse my language, but shit, is it really less than 3 weeks until I compete at Embassy Ball? It wasn’t even that long ago that I danced at Desert Classic.
It’s still weird to be doing a third competition this year and even weirder that each one has been only 2 or 3 months apart. Weird in a good way though.
It’s got me thinking about what’s changed or what I’ve done differently this year for these three competitions to be possible. I’m one of those people who get stuck on the idea that I just need that one big key thing to happen and then everything will work out. But really, it ends up being a bunch of smaller things that add up.
The funny thing is after I typed out the title of this post, I stared at my computer screen for a couple hours, in between browsing social media, and then decided to go to bed. That first sentence was finally written the next morning while I ate breakfast. I knew I was running late, but no one gets into the office until at least an hour after I do, so I decided not to rush and, at the same time, be productive while I drank my tea. It was English Breakfast. This final version wasn’t completed until that night, while I was drinking another cup of tea, an herbal blend.
I know I preach a “don’t give up” philosophy. The #dontgiveup hashtag appears on the majority of my Instagram posts. Perseverance, along with hard work and a bit (or a lot) of luck, has gotten me where I am today.
Fall down seven times, get up eight.
It doesn’t matter how slow you go, as long as you don’t stop.
I’ve shared all of these meme-worthy quotables and turned them into motivational mantras for myself. They and similar phrases help get me through the tough days, weeks and months. I’ve come this far, I can’t give up now.
Well, over this past week, I realized I have to change my tune a bit. I’ve reached a point where I don’t really have a choice. I have to give up.
It makes me anxious, but it’s for the best.
Hello my lovely readers!
Just a quick post tonight. I just finished up some work for the main day job. It’s been a busy week (and it’s only Wednesday!) with an extra project for the main job plus side work from the second job. That did not stop me from getting to my dance lesson tonight though.
Recovery from the flu has been frustratingly slow. My energy is still not at 100%. I go to bed around 8:30pm. I have this lingering congestion in my head and chest that refuses to leave, no matter how much medicine I throw at it. And I have developed painful knots in my neck and shoulder, a combination of coughing for over two weeks and working in my lesson on Tuesday as hard as I was two months ago, without consideration of the fact that I haven’t been working my body that hard for two months.
But my hip connection is feeling solid!
In the Facebook group related to the Momentum ’17 challenge I’m doing, someone asked how many people were holding down a job while also trying to build their business, and besides the obvious time challenge, what their biggest challenges were related to that situation. If I haven’t already explained, this challenge is for people working on building their own brand/business, a.k.a. entrepreneurs. Entrepreneurship is starting to feel like a cliché to me as so many people reject the normal way of making money (i.e., get a job with an already-established company) and strike out on their own. It’s funny to think that being “self-employed” or an “entrepreneur” used to be a euphemism for “can’t get a job.” Now it’s all the rage! I’m not one to jump on trends (I frequently avoid them on principle), but I do want to be able to eventually support myself with my writing and dancing, and there’s no time like the present to start thinking of the business side of things. And when it’s a free challenge, why not!
I had an idea for my next post, another one about climbing out of the comparison trap. I wanted to come up with a list of real things that I or anyone else could do that would help stop the comparisons and get back to a more positive mindset. The exercise in gratitude was ok, but I wanted something more practical and more concrete. When I am having trouble with a ballroom step, Teacher can give me very specific things to do to correct the issue. I’ve been stuck in this self-pity state for longer than I’d like to admit. I have plenty of excuses and some good, honest reasons, but that doesn’t change the fact that I’m only hurting myself. I actually googled “how to stop comparing” to see what others have written about the subject.
I’ve been feeling very stalled in my dancing. This isn’t news. I have no competitions on the calendar, and scheduling conflicts all around have been messing with my lesson and practice time. As much as I preach a “don’t give up!” philosophy, walking the walk has been much harder lately.