I’m sure you can guess by the title that I recently caught a cold. Because of this pesky virus, I missed a day of work and, more importantly, this week’s dance lesson. Curse you, microorganism! Don’t you know I have dancing to do?
It’s amazing how something so tiny can completely drain you of all energy and motivation. And frustrating. I spent two days on the couch, and during the commercial breaks of a Criminal Minds marathon, I kept thinking I should write something. Or read those books I’ve been meaning to read. Or do the laundry I didn’t do the day before. Something! Then the episode would come back on and I would slip back into a semi-conscious state. Sometimes I would fall asleep during one episode and wake up during another, and get confused as to why they were profiling a serial killer in Las Vegas when just a minute ago, they were looking for a killer in Atlantic City who was obsessed with the number 8. I knew exactly when I was missing the group class I planned to attend, however. Stupid cold.
I’m feeling better today, back at work, but still congested. I’ll be wiped out by the end of the day, but I would still drag my butt to the studio. Don’t want to get Teacher sick though, he has a showcase coming up with other students. So I’ll quarantine myself at home, which feels like a mix of smart self-care and punishment. I don’t feel well, but I can’t have the thing that makes me feel better (dance) because I might make other people not feel well. So I’ll miss my private lesson and three group classes this week. Having a cold makes me feel like a child with her arms crossed and pouting because she’s not getting her way but she knows why and is mad that her conscience isn’t letting her be selfish. Would anyone mind if I stomped my foot a little?
Hopefully, I’ll continue to recover quickly and be back to my normal routine next week. Sometimes these things get into my chest and I have a lingering cough for months. And you know, there are only about 3.5 months until US Dance Championships! I’m supposed to be learning silver for that comp, and it will be at least two weeks in between lessons because I happened to get sick on the wrong day of the week. On days like these, I lose steam in my confidence train and start to think I need to pull back, I’m going too far too fast. How can I learn silver for 4 dances in 3 months when I only take 1 or 2 private lessons a week? My brain is too foggy to do the math right now. Ok, I’m sure I can learn it, but I want to learn it enough so I won’t make a fool of myself on the floor among the “real” silver dancers. That’s not too much to ask, right? I know what Teacher would say and he would be right. “Shut up and stop doubting yourself!” But thanks to this most inconsiderate visitor, I will have to wait another week to get yelled at. Stupid cold.
In better news, I have my first Patreon patron! Major shout-out to Gary Flashner of Flashner Photography! As thanks for his patronage, he gets to read this post a day before it is published on thegirlwiththetreetattoo.com.