After about a week and a half out of the studio, I had a lesson with Teacher on Wednesday followed by almost an hour-long practice with a new practice partner. I think I pushed myself a little too far because I was exhausted and started getting a serious headache on the way home. There’s no time to slow down though; Ballroom Beach Bash is in four weeks!

I mailed my entry forms on the last day of February, and I found out that the comp will honor my “early bird” discount. It’s only $10, but I’ll take it! I could buy a cheap bottle of wine to celebrate my first time back on the competition floor.

Life outside of dance was incredibly stressful over the last week, and I’m on day 4 of that on-again off-again headache. I didn’t let that stop me from going to hip hop class on Thursday or my second lesson with Teacher on Friday. My body let me know that it wasn’t happy, but the bad days are even more important to show up for than the good days. You find out what you’re made of on those days.

Friday’s lesson was actually great, considering I wasn’t all there. We reviewed the trouble spots that we identified in waltz on Wednesday and then went through tango. I would just like to say that the tango routine that Teacher choreographed is awesome. But holy cow, it moves! Teacher actually tweaked a couple spots to give us a few extra counts to breathe before going into the next kickass section. I think it’s going to rock, but I also think if I get out of my groove for even a second, I’ll make the thing fall apart. I won’t have any time to think things through, just dance!

We managed to work on foxtrot too; normally, we only get through two dances at most in a single lesson. It’s the one routine I don’t know. Teacher kept making changes and I never got them on video. We did record it at the end of the lesson though, so now I have something to study at home.

We didn’t get to Viennese. I’m not too worried about it right now. I have that routine on video and pretty much memorized it while standing in line at the DMV (may as well make good use of the time!). I may change my mind once I actually try dancing it with Teacher, but I have plenty of other things to worry about. So for once, I’m not going to add it to my plate yet.

Four weeks to go…I haven’t started panicking yet or having random anxiety attacks, which is good. I’m sure they’ll come eventually, they always do. But I’m feeling strong in my dancing. Even if I don’t have all of the routines 100% memorized, I’m able to follow Teacher. The routines always end up changing on the floor anyways due to having to navigate around the other couples.

It sounds silly, but the one thing that’s been occupying my mind the most is my hair. I want to save the money and do it myself, now that it’s so short. I have an idea too, but haven’t tried it yet. It’s part laziness, part fear. I’m not a girly girl and never had much talent in the hair/makeup department, nor the desire to learn if I’m being honest. Of course, I know if I can’t manage it, I have the option of paying someone else. It’s still a bee in my bonnet though.

It still feels surreal. Am I really going this time?

Nothing is stopping me yet. I also found out on Friday that more work is coming my way from my second “on call” job, so I’ll be able to start saving for the next competition sooner than I thought. Could this be the year I finally regain my competition momentum? Here’s hoping!